Fear is a powerful emotion, one that does more damage than you may realize. Its fierce hold over your life brings out your vulnerable side. Your personal fears make you feel worried, anxious, stressed, and helpless. Derived from your deepest anxieties and darkest secrets – your fears can control you.
Somehow, these feelings retain enough power to consolidate the parts of your life that make you tick; the pieces of your subconscious that corner you into submission.
But it doesn’t have to be this way.
Your fears – though likely large in number – needn’t have this power. There are ways to lower this grip your fears hold over you. Check out the following steps. With determination, you will overcome your fears.
Soon, you will be in control.
1. Admit their existence.
In order to get anywhere, you must first admit the existence of your fears.
You could go along, pretending your bravery can face anything without breaking a sweat. But you’ll only be lying to yourself. Everyone – including your heroes – are afraid of something. Your fears may be limited to the common culprits – spiders, cramped quarters, heights, and the like. Perhaps your fears run deeper, maybe originating from a dark childhood experience.
Whether your fears are common or completely original to you, they are powerful. And they can cause you more pain that you realize. Either way, the first step in overcoming these terrors is admitting their existence. Nothing can be accomplished until this step is completed.
2. Understand their origin.
No matter how trivial or difficult your fears may be, you must understand them.
The perpetual fear of heights you’ve had since a young age? Try to understand its origin. Ask yourself when it began. How did it bubble to the surface of your subconscious? Then, try to figure out how it started. What caused it? Were you pushed into something that caused you anxiety?
Maybe that fear of loneliness stems from an isolated childhood. Ask yourself the tough question – what caused that isolation? Perhaps your family’s ideals forced a division in your household. In turn, this caused you pain. The feeling of being misunderstood and alone created that fear of loneliness.
Let’s not sugarcoat it: getting to the origin of your fears will be difficult. And yes – it might hurt. But in order to move on, you have to understand them. Ask yourself when, how, and why. Get to the bottom of your fears. Sooner than you realize those terrors will be a thing of the past.
3. Face them – either head on or indirectly.
People are often adamant that fears can only be overcome by facing them. While this isn’t the only step in the process, it’s certainly a part of it. Some folks – the more direct personality types – achieve this by literally facing their fears head on.
Got a fear of heights? These people often take drastic measures to face it. Skydiving, mountain climbing, taking a ride in a hot air balloon. It may sound crazy, and it’s likely one skydiving trip won’t fully do the trick. But with time this method tends to work.
If you aren’t the type to face your fears head on, don’t worry! There is another way. Which, I suppose, is lucky for those of us who fear spiders – myself included.
First: Calm your mind. Through yoga, hiking, writing, reading, or sitting on your patio while enjoying a gorgeous sunset. Whatever works for you.
Second: Consider your fears. Figure out how much control they currently hold over you.
Third: Be logical. That spider roaming your kitchen floor? Just how much harm does it do you?
Not much, right? Thought so.
Lastly: Equate that fear to something better.
Consider the sights you’re missing out on when you shut your eyes on a Ferris wheel ride.
Think about the healthy relationships you’ll never gain because you’re too worried everyone will leave you. Scared you’ll be left lonely and isolated as you were in your childhood.
Face your fears. Whether you need to scale a building or take up yoga, you must meet them as an equal.
4. Take away their power.
Fear should not control you. Though daunting, you must take away the power those terrors hold. Instead of submitting to the stress, worry, and pain they may cause, build up your confidence.
The opportunities you face are endless. Why let a lifelong fear of heights stop you from enjoying a zip line adventure in Costa Rica? The greatness of your life outweighs your fears. Believe it – it’s true.
You may feel those fears have strangled your growth for far too long to quit now. But you’re wrong. Anyone can overcome their fears. But you must snatch the power from them, first.
5. Fill that new void with good.
Once your fears have lost their edge, you have to fill that empty space.
Fill it with good things – healthy goals, passionate dreams, loving thoughts. Let the beauty of the world and your life have more control than your fears ever did. After all – it’s through happiness and healthy thoughts that the incredible is created.
Let the good parts of life fill that void. You’ll be thankful you did.
Overcome Your Fears
Don’t let fear control you. You are more than what causes you distress.
You’ve only got so much time to live your life. Don’t a trivial issue like a fear of heights get in your way of experiencing all you can. Only you are able to ensure your life is well-lived. Make it worthwhile.
Utilize the steps mentioned above. One day, with a little luck and effort on your part, your fears will lose their hold over you.